Am I The Lone Wolf In A Sea Of Wannabe Principals?

Yes, I believe in doing things that scare you. It’s for this very reason that I signed up for the Teacher Leadership Course through our Board. I struggled with this decision. I don’t really see myself as a leader — at least not in the more formalized way that I often see “leadership.” I have no dreams of being a principal. At one time, I had dreams of becoming a consultant, but those dreams have at least currently been replaced with my love for the classroom. I truly do love being around and working with kids. I have an incredible teaching partner, Paula, who teaches me something new every day, and I could not be more fortunate than to share a classroom space with her and our 29 amazing kindergarteners. Why then am I taking this course?

It’s a really good question. Last year, on my Annual Learning Plan, I indicated an interest in developing my leadership skills. I just finished my first year as the Curriculum and Site Support Teacher for Camp Power, and I wondered if some more formal leadership training would make me better at this position. I was no longer in charge of only my classroom, but instead the programming and implementation of this programming, for an entire camp. I needed to work closely with instructors. I needed to support instructors, children, and parents, while also collaborating with an on-site administrator. I was definitely moving out of the teacher realm. My plan was to take Leadership Part 1 through our Board last year, but I missed the sign-up deadline, and was then taking Reading Part 1. So I waited for the next school year, and now Leadership Part 1 has become a Teacher Leadership Additional Qualification Course. 

When I initially saw this news, I waited. I kept re-reading Kristin‘s tweet and the information posted online. And then, as a few spots remained, I took the plunge and signed up. October 17th was our first class, and in the first five minutes, I wondered if I made a mistake. As I looked around the room, thought about the people there that want to become administrators, and looked at the Ontario Leadership Framework on the table in front of me, I feared that this course was not meant for a teacher like me. Am I really this kind of leader?

I shared some of my fears with the table group. I even shared some with the course instructor that was part of our group … but I didn’t leave the room. I didn’t walk away. I’ll admit that I considered it, but the truth is, this course is really interesting. It’s giving me a better understanding of the leaders that I know in our school and Board settings …

  • from principals,
  • to consultants,
  • to reading specialists,
  • to teacher leaders … maybe even those people like me.

This course is forcing me to think about how I act, what I do, and what I believe, and it’s causing me to reflect on myself in a leadership role.

  • How am I as a listener?
  • How do I view colleagues?
  • How do I make decisions?
  • What changes could I make to my practices?
  • How might these changes impact on me and those around me?

It’s forcing me to slowly expand my definition of “leadership,” and maybe see a school leader as more than just a principal. And this is just after the first class. While I still wonder if I might be one of the few people here that does not have dreams of becoming a principal, maybe that’s okay. I wonder if this course gets at the heart of any professional development: what you get out of it may vary depending on your background knowledge, starting point, and goals. My leadership dreams may be different from those of some other educators, but there’s still value in learning how to be a better leader. Have others taken a leadership course and felt similarly apprehensive? Did your course change these feelings, and if so, how? I wonder if I might shortly learn that I am not a lone wolf in a sea of wannabe principals, but if not, I’d like to believe that all of us can still happily co-exist. 

Aviva

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